Our First FI Meet Up

When Winnie and I first found this FI group on Facebook, we were just looking for like-minded people we could connect with.

Eventually, we got an invite — and for once, it was one we could actually attend. We plugged the address into Maps… and then looked at each other like:

“Wait… are we really about to walk into a stranger’s house for tacos and money talk?”

We hadn’t expected the meetup to be at someone’s home.

Not a restaurant.

Not a library room.

A stranger’s house.

Honestly, it felt a little intimidating. We didn’t know anyone. We didn’t know the etiquette. Do we knock? Just walk in? Bring drinks? A side dish? A sacrifice to the FIRE gods?

Thankfully, Rob — the one familiar name in the group — messaged us back with the most comforting instructions ever:

“Just show up. Bring your appetite. That’s it.”

So we did.

Driving to Burnsville, we had that quiet, nervous energy — the kind where you’re excited, but also wondering what exactly you’ve gotten yourself into. We even sat in the car for a moment after pulling up, both thinking the same thing without saying it.

Then we saw the sign in the yard:

“Stacking Benjamins Meetup Here.”

And just like that, it felt less intimidating… and more like we were stepping into something we didn’t know we needed.

Inside, everything was welcoming and intentional — signs pointing to the bathroom, the kitchen, the garbage. People greeting us with genuine warmth. No awkwardness. No judgment.

Just instant connection.

It felt like walking into a room full of people who already understood us — because they were on the same journey.

The Idea of the meeting was "Sharing Our Money Scripts". When it came time for everyone to share their money scripts, Winnie and I took a deep breath and opened up too. It felt surprisingly natural — like the room had already earned our trust.

David: “My Script Was Written in Pencil Until Winnie Brought the Sharpie”

Growing up, my money script wasn’t dramatic or traumatic — it was just… vague. As a middle child, I learned to be flexible, adaptable, easygoing. My money habits reflected that. I wasn’t reckless, but I wasn’t intentional either. My script was basically: “I’ll figure it out later.”

Then I met Winnie.

Where my script was written in pencil, hers was carved in stone.

Where I drifted, she planned.

Where I was flexible, she was focused.

And instead of resisting that difference, something in me opened up. My natural adaptability made me willing to learn, listen, and rewrite my script.

Together, we turned my rough draft into something clear:

Be frugal where it matters

Be intentional with every dollar

Allow joyful splurges without guilt

Winnie didn’t rewrite my script for me.

She handed me the Sharpie.

Winnie’s Money Script was captivating — “Scarcity Wasn’t a Mindset. It Was Reality.”

Winnie’s story carries a different weight — the kind that shapes a person long before they understand what money is.

She grew up in real scarcity.

Her parents worked in factories in other provinces, gone for months at a time, just so there could be rice for dinner. Some nights, even that wasn’t guaranteed.

By age six, she wasn’t just a child — she was responsible for her siblings.

She remembers waiting at the bus station during Chinese New Year, trying to recognize her own mother after months apart… and almost mistaking her aunt for her.

Her script was carved from:

• Absence

• Responsibility far beyond her age

• Fear of not having enough

• The instinct to save everything because tomorrow was uncertain

And even now — with stability, savings, and a life she built through sheer determination — that script still whispers to her.

She still cringes when repair bills run high.

She still feels a knot in her stomach when grocery prices jump.

She still has nights where the old fear wakes her up, telling her they don’t have enough, even though the math says otherwise.

She sees the numbers.

She understands the numbers.

But the emotional math is harder to rewrite.

And yet, she keeps trying.

She keeps rewriting.

She keeps choosing a future that looks nothing like her past.

The Stories That Made the Night Memorable

This meetup wasn’t just small talk. It was people opening up about the beliefs they inherited, the patterns they broke, and the ones they’re still trying to unlearn. One man was — Growing Up With “We Can’t Afford That” He grew up with a single dad who worked hard but never had enough. Money wasn’t discussed — it was avoided. He learned early that wanting things was risky, because the answer was usually no. His story echoed parts of Winnie’s upbringing — different details, same emotional imprint.

Another member shared how she was The One Who Broke the Cycle. She grew up poor in a big family, but she was the one who said: “This ends with me.” She built a different life, and now she’s raising a daughter who’s already making thoughtful financial decisions in her early 20s. Watching them together was like seeing generational change happening in real time.

Another member shared about Escaping the Assistance Trap. He grew up in a community where government assistance was the norm. It helped families survive, but it also created a ceiling — a point where earning more meant losing benefits before you could afford to stand on your own. He talked about the courage it took to push past that “dead zone,” to accept short‑term discomfort for long‑term freedom.

It was the purest example of delayed gratification we’ve ever heard.

One of the most surprising and beautiful parts of the night was seeing how different everyone’s stage of FI was.

Some people were already retired.

Some were halfway there.

Some were just starting.

Some were still figuring out what FI even meant for them.

And that variety did something powerful:

It showed us the range of what life can look like on this path. Seeing people ahead of us gave us a glimpse of what’s possible.

Seeing people behind us reminded us how far we’ve come.

Seeing people right where we are made us feel less alone. It was fantastic — energizing, grounding, and motivating all at once. Before we knew it, the clock hit 9 p.m.

The conversations were still flowing, but people slowly started gathering their things, saying goodbyes, exchanging hugs, and promising to meet again. We stepped outside into the cool evening air, and got into the car for the drive back to Rochester. The whole way home, we talked about the stories, the people, the lessons, and how unexpectedly meaningful the evening had been. It wasn’t just a meetup. It was a reminder that we’re not alone on this journey — and that community might be one of the most powerful tools in the FI toolbox.

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